No, I’m not asking if I personally should take a gift to a wedding I’m taking photos at, or whether I take a gift if I go to a wedding as a guest… I’m talking again about one of the questions that seem to trouble people lucky enough to be invited to a wedding.
It’s my personal opinion (based on the enormous number of weddings I’ve seen) that guests should probably do what the hell they want. If you’re feeling generous and want to really show the lucky couple how you feel about them then buy them a house (I wonder if that ever happens?), otherwise buy them something that you think will make them laugh, or will reflect some key aspect of their relationship. Although if they have a fiery relationship then the boxing gloves you think will be a hilarious gift may not go down so well, especially if they use them on you…
The brutal truth is that on the actual day the bride and groom will be so preoccupied they’ll never notice that you weren’t one of the people leaving a gift on the gift table at the back of the venue. By the time they’re back from the honeymoon they’ll be too overwhelmed (or too busy fighting) to spot that they didn’t receive a gift from you. So if you want to a be a tightwad then go ahead; you’ll probably get away with it.
As a guest there are only a few things that you can do to really spoil the day, and for the record they are as follows: Starting a fight with anyone (especially the groom, or the vicar, or the paige boy) tends to raise a few eyebrows. The other thing guaranteed to cause a ruckus would be if you were to sneak into the reception venue before other guests arrive and attach a photoshopped (or worse - REAL!) photo of you and the bride (or groom) in a compromising position to the underside of every guests’ chair. Now did that really happen at a wedding I was working at? Well you’ll just have to ask me next time you see me...